CHEEZY PICK-UP LINES
| Do you like cheesy pick-up lines
or do you just want to do it? |
| Excuse me, I am about to go home
to masturbate and needed a name to go with the face. |
| Do you know what'd look good
on you? Me. |
| Pick a number between 1 and 10.
You lose now take off your clothes. |
| Hey, baby, wanna lock crotches
and swap gravy? |
| For a fat chick, you sure have
small tits. |
| Do you have a mirror in your
pocket? (Why?) 'Cause I could see myself in your pants. |
| Would you fuck a complete stranger?
(No) Then Hi, my name is Jack. |
| I had a wet dream about you last
night. Would you like to make it a reality? |
| Do you believe in the hereafter?
Then you know what I'm here after. |
| I'm conducting a survey on the
taste of vaginas. Wanna be my first participant? |
| Cold out isn't it? (staring at
breasts). |
| If I washed my dick, would you
suck it? (No.) Oh, so you like to suck dirty dicks. |
| I've had quite a bit to drink,
and you're beginning to look pretty good. |
| Hi. Are you legal? |
| If I told you that you had a
great body, would you hold it against me? |
| I must expel some seminal fluid.
May I use your body? |
| Hi, I've been undressing you
with my eyes all night long, and think it's time to see if I'm right. |
| Are my undies showing? (No.)
"Would you like them to?" |
| I may not be the best looking
guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you. |
| Hey Baby! I'd like to use your
thighs as earmuffs. |
| Hi, my name's Jack. You might
want to remember it now, because you'll be screaming it later! |
| Can I please be your slave tonight? |
| Hi. You'll do. |
| Let's go to my place and do the
things I'll tell everyone we did anyway. |
| It's not just going to suck itself. |
| The word of the day is "legs."
Let's go back to my place and spread the word. |
| Do you like to dance? Well then,
could you go dance so I can talk to your friend? |
| Do you know the difference between
a hamburger and a blow job? (No!) Do you want to do lunch? |
| Pardon me, are you in heat? |
| I'd like to get between your
legs and eat my way straight to your heart. |
| Wow! Are those real? |
| There are 265 bones in the human
body. How'd ya like one more? |
| My love for you is like diaharrea,
I just can't hold it in. |
| If I was hungry for crabs would
you spread your legs for me? |
| Be unique and different, say
yes. |
| You might not be the best looking
girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away. |
| Excuse me. Do you want to fuck
or should I apologize? |
| ****I was just curious?
Are you as good as all the guys say you are? |
| Hey good lookin', whatcha got
cookin'? Nuthin could be finer than the taste of your vagina! |
| You smell wet. |
| Will you help me find my lost
puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street. |
| Which is easier? You getting
into those tight pants or getting you out of them? |
| Do you spit or swallow? |
| Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,
I like Spaghetti, Let's go fuck! |
| Can I buy you a drink or do you
just want the money? |
| Do you know what I want in a
woman? Me. |
| Gee, that's a nice set of legs,
what time do they open? |
| Your daddy must play the trumpet,
because he sure made me horny! |
| Ya know, if we cut your arms
off, you'd look just like Venus de Milo. |
| Would you like to dance or should
I go fuck myself again? |
| Pardon me, do you mind if I push
in your stool? |
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